Clean Long Jokes About Five Monkeys

Start with a cage containing five monkeys. In the cage, hang a banana on a string and put stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana.

As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the monkeys with cold water. After a while, another monkey will make an attempt with the same response -- all of the monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Keep this up for several days.

Turn off the cold water. If, later, another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it even though no water sprays them.

Now, remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and attempts to climb the stairs. To his horror, all of the other four monkeys attack him. After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted.

Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked in the same manner. The previous newcomer also takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm.

Replace another of the original monkeys with a new one. The new one attempts to the climb the stairs and is attacked as well. The second newcomer will join the attack like the first one did. Now two of the four monkeys that beat the latest arrival both have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs, or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey.

After replacing the fourth and fifth original monkeys with the same method, all the monkeys which had originally been sprayed with cold water have been replaced. None of the monkeys now in the cage have ever been sprayed with water whilst attempting to climb the stairs. Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs.

Why not?

"Because that's the way it's always been done around here."

Replace the Monkeys with company management, and the stairs with policy and procedural improvements, and you get the same results.